Student-athletes are in abundance on the UNH campus, but rarely are professional football players found in the MUB. Former NFL player Esera Tuaolo spoke to students Wednesday night about becoming one of the first football player to come out as gay as a part of UNH’s Coming Out Week.
UNH centers its Coming Out Week around National Coming Out Day, which is always October 11. Alliance, one of the organizations responsible for these events, is a “support group for LGBTQ+,” said Kelsey Myers, chair of Alliance.
Wednesday night’s event, Being True to Yourself with NFL Veteran Esera Tuaolo, was “a collaboration of a lot of different groups on campus,” Myers said.
Coming Out Week is held for “exposure to the group [Alliance] and to the issues [of the LGBTQ+ community],” Nathan Laperle, Alliance program coordinator said. Esera Tuaolo addressed some of these issues in his talk.
Although Tuaolo was a defensive lineman who played professional football for nine years and played in a Super Bowl, he is happier now in retirement than he was playing football. “I love what I do [now] because I get to go around the country and inform [people] about the LGBT community,” he said.
Throughout his career, Tuaolo kept his sexuality a secret, never telling a teammate in high school, college, or the NFL. It wasn’t until two years after he retired that he first said he was gay, in an HBO Sports interview in 2002. Tuaolo said he retired because he no longer wanted to keep this secret and he “wanted to be happy.”
When Tuaolo came out as gay, “this huge burden came lifted off… I felt light as a feather.”
Keeping his sexuality a secret hurt Tuaolo mentally and emotionally until he finally spoke the truth. The HBO Special “was probably the best thing I ever did in my life… otherwise I would be six feet under.”
Tuaolo shared how the discriminatory jokes and taunts can upset people, including himself. “Sticks and stones may break bones, but words will never hurt me. That’s full of s**t… words kill,” he said, in reference to depression and suicides in the gay community.
He urged students and people of this generation to make a change to these types of behavior and thoughts. “Please step up and do what you can.”
Tuaolo’s presence on campus has already had a positive impact on some students. He said that he has been contacted by about 15 UNH student-athletes who are in the closet and are happy that he is here.
Tuaolo’s visit and speech promote Alliance’s goals, which are “to promote a safer campus” and to raise awareness, according to A.J. Jeffries, the vice chair of Alliance.
UNH Coming Out Week features at least an event each day; Thursday, two events were held, the Ally Rally in the afternoon and the Come Out, Speak Out event at 7 p.m. in the Granite State Room. The Ally Rally was originally planned to take place in the Murkland Courtyard, but was moved to the Waysmeet Center due to rain.
The Ally Rally is “a public event to expose people who wouldn’t normally see that [the LGBTQ+ community],” Myers said.
Larry Brickner-Wood, chaplain and director of Waysmeet Center, said that this is the sixth year that the Ally Rally has been held, but the first time that it has been affected by the rain. “Allies need to be visible… [and] stand with visible and vocal support,” Brickner-Wood said of the event.
The Ally Rally is meant to attract faculty and staff, with students to stand in solidarity said a staff member from the Office of Multicultural Affairs.
Those in attendance at the Ally Rally used this event to discuss what the term LGBTQ+ encompasses; it stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning. A.J Jeffries explained that the ‘+’ at the end of the acronym is “an umbrella, [to include] so many different terms.”
Other Coming Out Week events continue into the weekend; Friday night’s event is Come OUT, Dance OUT, held in the Strafford Room from 8 – 12 p.m.
The final event of the week will be the Ally Brunch on Saturday morning at the Waysmeet Center at 10 a.m., instead of the usual Ally Dinner because of the shortened academic week due to Columbus Day.
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